January 8, 2010

Hey Carter! I love you!

Well, it's Friday today and that makes me VERY happy! It was a long week of a lot of work. Tomorrow your sister starts swimming lessons again. I think she will love it.

I went to see you today and your pinwheel was completely broken. I don't even know where the part that spins is! So on Monday, Dan and I will look online for a way to maybe order pinwheels in bulk so we have lots on hand for times like this. :)

I scrapbooked some more pictures tonight. I really like doing that. And tonight I even got to scrapbook the pictures of the balloons after your sister's birthday party that we sent to you

and the balloons I saw floating away while we were at the Broncos game.

Those pictures made me especially happy! Well little one, I am sleepy and should get to bed. Sweet dreams Carter! I love you!

January 6, 2010

Hi Carter! I love you! Well, your mommy had a pretty good day today. Work went ok, but the best part of my day came tonight. One of my friends came over and we spent the entire evening just talking. We talked about everything! We talked about you, of course! How couldn't we? :) You are so wonderful! We talked about life and contentment and peace. We talked a lot about God and what He wants for us. It was just nice to sit and talk about everything. To know that nothing was off limits and that everything we discussed was discussed with love. She's a great friend! I even showed off pictures of some of your friends too. She loved them and just kept telling me how cute they all are!

Well little one, since my friend was here, it is an hour past my bed time. As you can guess, I'm tired!

I love you. Thank you for helping me learn and for teaching me what to say to people I love. You amaze me, Carter! I love you!

January 5, 2010

Hey you! I love you and I am sorry I haven't written to you in a couple days. Work has been crazy busy and I have been super tired. Oh well though, right? I'm trying to take good care of myself and your little baby in there.

I got some really good news yesterday. Ben's mommy is going to have a baby too! Their baby is due about a month before ours. It's pretty exciting. You and Ben are going to be big brothers to babies here on Earth! Way to go boys!

Well little one. I am so tired. I miss you and love you more than you will ever know. Sweet dreams!

January 2, 2010

Hi! I love you!

Well, today was a fairly uneventful day. I got my blood drawn again and my levels are going up so that's a really good thing. Other than that, I ordered some pictures so I can scrapbook them and your daddy seems to be tearing everything apart in the garage tonight. I guess he wants to build a new work bench. I hope he likes what he builds and that it doesn't take long to finish. Because while he builds, the vehicles live outside. But anyway, your mama is sleep so I should get to bed. I love you, Carter! Sweet dreams!

January 1, 2010

Happy New Year, Carter!



I'm sorry I didn't write to you yesterday. I really wanted to but by the end of the day, I just went to sleep. So, I will just have to wish you a happy new year today!

Yesterday was a big day, little boy. You welcomed a very special friend yesterday. Little James went home to heaven after almost 10 months of blessing the world. I know you were there to welcome him. Are you showing him all of your favorite parts of heaven? I bet you are!

Yesterday on my way to work, I knew you were going to take care of him because I saw a huge flock of geese flying with one a little further out front than usual. I knew it was you leading all of your friends to James. I bet you had a huge party. Be sure to give him some extra special love from his family ok? They had him for so long here, I can't even imagine how much they miss him.

Yesterday was also a big day because we found out that you are going to be a big brother. We couldn't believe it. Your little brother or sister will be born sometime near your first heavenly birthday. thanks for helping us out on this, buddy. It sure is a blessing. I want to remind you again that we are not and couldn't ever replace you. That would be impossible. We do want another baby to hold here on Earth though. I love you, Carter and you will always be my second born, by first son, my little goose! I love you!



And to tell you the truth, this is what I needed to really be able to let 2009 go. You see, 2009 was the year I was pregnant with you. It was the year I carried you inside of me. It was the year I held you in my arms and told you to your sweet little face that I love you. It is also the year you died. It is the year you earned your wings. What a year! How could I let that go? Truth is, I never will.

But, 2010 holds the promise of new life. It holds hope and requires all of my faith. It is the year that I have already been blessed with my sixth child. Wow. I can't believe that. Six babies. One living kiddo, four in heaven and one just beginning inside of me.

Life is a miracle, Carter. All life deserves to be celebrated. Please watch out for your new little brother or sister for me. And have fun up there with James. His mommy is fun, so I am sure he is too!

I love you, buddy! Happy New Year!

December 30, 2009

Hey baby! Will you please say hello to Caiden for me? He was born still on December 22nd and his mommy posted on our discussion forum about him tonight. Tell him his mommy loves him and give him lots of hugs for her ok? I know you will, buddy. Because you are a sweet kid. I love you.

Well, your mama had a sad day again today. I was looking at all sorts of pictures of your sister when she was a baby and they made me sad. Sad because I will never have any pictures of you like them. Pictures of you smiling or sitting up or crawling. It made me sad. Then I saw a pregnant woman who also has a little boy of her own here on Earth to love on every day and that just made it worse. But then Josh's mommy called just to make me feel better. Josh must be pretty great. How couldn't he be with a mommy like her!?! And then Maya's mommy helped me to feel better too. She's so sweet! The day ended up a lot better than it started so that was a really good thing.

Tomorrow is New Year's Eve. THat is the day before the new year starts. You see, every year has 52 weeks, 12 months and either 365 or 366 days in it and when those days weeks and months are done, then it's a whole new year. Kinda complicated for a four month old, I know. But I wanted to teach you all about it. And, tomorrow at workwe are going to eat all day long and celebrate the new year each hour on the hour. It should be fun. :) Well litle one, it is once again bed time. You be a good listener and go right to sleep for God or Jesus or whoever puts you to bed every night. I hope whoever it is rocks you and reads you a story and a devotion and a Bible story every night, because that's what I would do if you were here! Sweet dreams love of mine. I love you!

December 29, 2009

Happy 4 Month Heavenly Birthday, Carter!

I love you!

I hope you have received your balloons by now. We sent you four this month instead of just one. And we got you two darker blue ones and two dark green ones to switch it up a little bit!



Your sister totally melted my heart when we got to the cemetery. She got out of the car and marched right over to your headstone and patted her little hand on it. I guess she sees me doing it when we visit you so she decided she needed to do it too! It was so sweet.

She saw you again while we were out there. You must be in about the same place every time because she always looks toward the West.

I also saw flocks and flocks of geese today. Some even flew right over my head and honked really loud. It was awesome! I know you were looking out for me today. You are so sweet.

Thank you again for bringing all of your friends' mommies into my life. Without them and the rest of our friends and familiy, I don't know that I could make it. They keep me sane.

Well little one, it has been a big day. Your sister went all day without any accidents again today. She totally amazes me! And with the celebration we had for you, I am tired! Sweet dreams Carter and happy 4 month heavenly birthday. I love you!